Satisfaction

Words from 'Utmost for His Highest' by Oswald Chambers in today's devotional:

"The refusal to be disillusioned is the cause of much of the suffering in human life. It works this way- if we love a human being and do not love God, we demand of [that person] every perfection and every rectitude, and when we do not get it we become cruel and vindictive; we are demanding of a human being that which he or she cannot give. There is only one Being Who can satisfy the last aching abyss of the human heart, and that is the Lord Jesus Christ. Why our Lord is apparently so severe regarding every human relationship is because He knows that every relationship not based on loyalty to Himself will end in disaster. Our Lord trusted no man, yet He was never suspicious, never bitter. Our Lord's confidence in God and in what His grace could do for any man, was so perfect that he despaired of no one. If our trust is placed in human beings, we shall end in despairing of everyone."

We should never trust ANYONE... hmm. weird.

Oswald Chambers is not Jesus, so we shouldn't just take him at his word, but I think I agree with this statement. Since we are all fallen people, we should never trust anyone with the things we need from God. I know, now you're saying, 'oh, well yeah, duh.' but wait a second.

How many of us are trusting God for everything that we need?

I'm not.

I can't. It's too hard. It requires too much faith. Not a day goes by where I don't allow at least one person to speak life in the form of a compliment to me and for at least a second I am illusioned by what they said. I have to constantly be in prayer about this, because if I allow myself to exist in that moment after someone said I was good or talented or anointed at something, I'm trusting them for the identity I must be given by Jesus. Now, I know God locks His word up in the mouth of a friend many times, but we must be careful to recognize it not only as a word from Him, but as His mouth that is speaking it... just through someone.

Welp, that's about it for today.

God Is Crazy.

Wow. What a mysterious, terrifyingly close God we have... Or rather, that has us.

It's 4:15ish... pm.

I'm so floored, almost paralyzed by the awe I'm in of Him. It's physically hard to lift fingers to type.

I feel like I just took a couple drags of marijuana, really.. heavy. But good. Very good. So bear with me as I try to make sense.

Here's what I've come to from events of the past couple days, this day, this moment, being just as intense:

*God speaks via the clouds, trees, wind, voices of friends, numbers on our clocks, license plates and odometers, the words stitched on the backs of people's hats, the cop car, ambulance or fire truck that just pulled by you, even through music featuring a made up language of an icelandic-speaking homosexual.

Here are just a couple events over the past few days that have revealed these venues of God's voice:

Sunday:

My friend Alex has a thing for trees... She loves how they grow up, reaching up and worshiping the Lord with their existence. I've found They are waiting for the Lord to let His wind push them and have them clap their hands for Him in worship (Isaiah 55). She told me this at lunch along with Blake Slatten, and that night at cluster a man had a vision of a tree in the middle of the room, with leaves that are for healing, available to people who are in need of His Touch (Revelation 22).

Monday:

She and I sat on boot hill in Yukon, in awe, because as we thanked the Lord for the wind, He increased the intensity of it, multiple times. At that moment, we looked to the right, and the sun peeked out from behind a sky filled with clouds. Then, 10 birds that were completely white flew from right to left across our field of view (hadn't seen any like these all day, or after this moment). Then, looking back right, the sun made rays underneath the clouds. Incredible.

I got a pain in my hips right before we were going to watch Batman: Dark Night, and when I sat down in my seat, the back of a man's hat in front of me just said 'Payne.' He was one of only three other people in the theatre. I had listened to Zach Payne's record earlier, and I was in pain, so that was cute I guess. Not real pleasant, and I'm not gonna try and interpret the event, but I'm just saying... God's everywhere.

Then, when I was about to drive back to Norman, my odometer read 77055. Psalm 77 and Isaiah 55 are both very close to me.. also extremely relevant to the day.

In the car, I probably saw 10 or so numbers that directly spoke to me. One of which was my birthdate, 12:31, as I asked the Lord if this was what he had planned for me for that day. It's cool, too, because Luke 12:31 says, 'Instead, seek His Kingdom, and these things will be added to you.' Which for me is huge because God has put this juicy plate of food in front of me at his dining table, and He's testing to see if I will keep my eyes on His Face instead of some blessing He's offering. He's after me.

He's after you.

He is a jealous lover running after you. (Phil Rice song 'Hallelujah')

Today:

Talked with Bo in the car to see Blake at Plaid about the parallels God puts in our lives, like when you see a flask or something in a catalog and someone gives one to you the next day who is a complete stranger. (I'm trying to paraphrase and just give you the relevant stuff, but I think you know the little blip weird moments I'm talking about.... Oh yeah, I guess some people use the word 'coincidence'... hahaha, riight.) For some reason, I thought to say something about my pastor, Ken. When Bo and I walked into Plaid, Ken was sitting at a booth, eating his lunch.

Then I walked with the Lord around my Lake and I was going to look up a certain passage, but it fell open to Isaiah 55, and as I read through it, Holy Spirit just blew my mind with how he has made that chapter alive to me these last three days.

Then I talked to Brett on the phone (He's 24 hours from coming home from Israel!). He brought up 'out of the blue' the passage about Elisha and Elijah and asking for a double portion. 2 hours prior to this, I was reading Experiencing God (a devotional) and guess what the title was... "A double portion." The reference verse was the same thing Brett brought up!

Then he brought up the story of Joseph, saying he thought of me because it's my middle name. Just last night, Alex asked me what my middle name was. A question I hadn't been asked in months at least.

Moral of today's story: The Lord is speaking to you (clock says 4:55 right now). He even timed my typing this to land on 55. He's a jealous lover running after you. He wants you to know that there are no coincidences. You are being irreverent to the Lord to say there are. God is in control. When you are living in intimacy with Him, it makes much more sense, so just tap into it. Surrender control. Release the reigns. Keep your eyes on His Face and off the blessing.

Anything that penetrates, resonates, communicates, comforts, challenges, or convicts you about this post is not from me. It's the Lord using my heavy fingers to speak very specifically and intimately with you. 

Thank you's to the empty people that allowed God to use them so I could hear from Him:

Phil Rice

Stephen Pyle

Madison Kerner

Blake Slatten

Bo Walbrick

Brett Colclasure

Alex Ford

Please stay empty, you seven. God's doing miracles through you.

Hearing God In All The Non-Religious Places

I was about to go to sleep, but couldn't wait to write this:

Just got off the phone with Madison. It was awesome. The Lord definitely knew what He was doing when He had us lead that trip together... Mostly because it wasn't the trip- it's how God is still actively moving because of the spurring on that happens every time we're around each other. A very iron-sharpening-iron thing.

Here are a couple things I got from our conversation that I feel the need to blog:

We need to listen to the Lord for what He is really saying, not what our religious ears are hearing.

'religious ears' : By this I mean the phenomenon that happens when we've seen God move a lot. We've started to feel like we've figured out what God is trying to say because of an association of a particular word, event or situation to a past one. 'Well, last time this happened, it turned out to be this...' should never be the end of our interpretation of His Voice. I do believe God brings rhythms, patterns, and repetition in our lives (I'm the king of finding repetitions to be God's urging), but failing to consider that God may not be merely repeating Himself in any given situation is to quench Holy Spirit. Let us take each new conversation, interaction, season, and change in our lives as new moments, new and unfiltered avenues for God speak to us.

I've experienced a lot of weird situations this summer. I'm not accustomed to either living in Africa or on the road around the US for 11 weeks. It's not normal for me to meet a bunch of new people, most of which I will never see again, spend a few moments with them, then understand that we both have very different lives to go out and live. From the child in the African hospital that I spent minutes praying with to the camp staff of Wildweek I spent 5 weeks around, each new person I met this summer has a home very disconnected from mine. But, with the Kingdom mind, we can see that God has intricately crossed our paths with another person for some reason. Since there is no such thing as coincidence, it becomes more apparent, clear, and common that God is up to big things in small places. So perhaps it would be more accurate to say all these 'small' relationships with these 'random' people involve the very same home. As believers, sons and daughters of the Lord, we are home only in the Lord.

In Tulsa For A Night Or So

The tour is over. 

I'm hilariously, helplessly, ridiculously, completely, unashamedly, forever in love with you.

I don't want the things I don't need:

money.

music.

recognition.

peace.

comfort.

life.

a girl.

family.

purpose.

success.

I need you. Your heart is all that I want. If all these things never come, or aren't right for me, or you take them away, I don't care. Just let me have you. Just let me see your face. Just let me know that you're there. If any or all of these things hinder me from knowing you more, refuse them and take them away. I hate them. I hate anything that keeps me from knowing you more. I'm disgusted by the way our Enemy has slipped into almost everything, making us able to stand on our own.

Sitting here with the T.V. on.... Sigur Ros playing in my headphones.

Some pervert is making money off of a girl on his show increasing his ratings just because she looks like she wants to have sex with me... Despite the fact she's actually looking at a camera. Stupid. I hate late night T.V.

Turned the T.V. off.

Even as I'm writing this, Enemy is right there on the wall trying to get to me through the T.V.

Funny, though. I just told you I hate that crap. It's doing nothing for me.

I've tasted too much of you to get pleasure from that crap.

Pause.

Re-reading what I just wrote. Seeing if it made any sense.

Changing a couple words so hopefully the readers will understand.

Don't know why I'm writing like this... Maybe cuz it's 2:03 am and I've been on the road all day.

Deep breath.

I love Sigur Ros.

Their music has accompanied some awesome prayer times.

Got to see Phil today. I love him. I'm gonna do a post on him soon.

Pause.

Thinking about Phil and how excited I am about living with him this year.

I got to go pray with Phil and some Bridgeway people today in OKC on the way to Tulsa. I love that. I've missed that this summer: people hungry for the face of God, allowing Holy Spirit to fall. People that spend so much time around the Lord that their spiritual gifts just flow during prayer. Empty people. People like Brett Colclasure, Madison Kerner, Stephen Pyle, and Blake Slatten.

It's late. I wanna be able to get up and see Grant tomorrow.

Current Mood: 'Experienced the Lord's peace today and gained more disdain toward the things that keep me from Him.'

"Blessed Are The Poor In Spirit...

...for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven."

Matthew 5:3

This Mozambican girl in the photo will almost positively never have the things that are listed on her shirt as her 'favourite' things: new shoes, text messaging, jewelry, MP3 players...

It's the very first thing Jesus said in his most famous sermon. And honestly, I haven't really known what it means to be poor in spirit until it happened to me. I had a lot of speculation, and I guess I sort of got it, but man... When it really happens to you, you feel it. It's funny how things all of a sudden become truth when you experience them. That's what I love about the Lord. He's forced me to understand that He is real because I've experienced Him.

But back to being poor in spirit:

It popped up in a devotional I read today and really stuck to the walls of my heart because I've been praying through and hearing from the Lord about being empty. Emptiness is always going to precede me knowing God more, seeing Him at all. Every time I exist in a moment, I'm clouding my view of the Kingdom and the very face of God. And I've seen too much of His Face to make the foolish move of allowing things to blur that view. I think I'd be fine if I were blind. The eyes on my face get in the way a lot when my heart's eyes should be the ones that are seeing the Lord.

But back to being poor in spirit:

Jesus did not come to Earth to teach us. He came to make us into what He has taught us to be.* We don't even get to boast over our obedience. It is the Lord in us having His way with us, transforming us. So before we get to feeling good about ourselves because we helped at a soup kitchen or read our Bibles or prayed, lets remember that the Lord did that. He allowed us to be a part of Heaven coming to Earth and worked through us to make that happen. Everything we do to advance the Kingdom has been done despite us.

But back to being poor in spirit:

It means emptiness. Rid of ourselves. Poured out. Dead. 

The very foundation of the Kingdom is poverty. As long as we are thinking well of ourselves and going out and existing in our daily lives, we are missing the Kingdom. We are not taking ground in the Kingdom. We are losing it. But when we allow allll those crappy parts of our lives- the bills that can't seem to get paid, the 'accidental' injuries, the breakups, the loneliness, the suffering- to break us of our selves trying to live our lives and realize what they really are there for: God has blessed you with them. He's given you the opportunity to be poor in spirit. To see the way He can move His Kingdom in your life.

If you're reading this, I'm praying that you come up with no solutions to your problems. I don't wish for you to pull through on the next car payment, to find a friend to pacify your isolation. I pray for the Lord to be only thing that you have. Then, when He blows your mind with His perfect Provision, don't thank me. I didn't write this. Well, I pray that this was not of me. I pray that anything said here that was of me to be forgotten as soon as you get off the internet.

Blake

James 'Blake' Slatten.

I just got done talking with him for about an hour about the upcoming changes in our lives and how our current interactions with the Lord are preceding them. It was great.

Blake is the person in my life that I seem to (oddly) be very similar to:

He played high school baseball; I was a skateboarder.

He listened to country music back then; I rocked out to Limp Bizkit (unfortunately).

He trims his hair between 1 and 3 times a month; I haven't cut my hair in a year and a half.

He gags when he has to pick up coins; I just put a quarter in my mouth to gross him out earlier today.

He knows how to two-step; I rip out my guitar strings during Neighborhood shows.

He's going to live in Waco, TX in the fall; I'm moving into a different house in Norman, OK in August.

Also:

We both go by the name 'Blake'.

Our initials (that we go by) are both BJS.

Both of our last names start with 'S', are two-syllabled, and have double letters starting with the 4th letter.

We both hate lettuce, tomatoes, and onions on any sandwich or hamburger.

We have both led mission trips to Mozambique.

Both of us were accepted to Elevate (Antioch Training School in Waco, TX).

Both of us bunch- not fold- our toilet paper.

We slept in the same bed starting in May for the summer (as long as I wasn't in Africa or on the road).

There's something else we have in common that I will have to disclose at a later date due to the risk of certain people finding out via this post. (No, we're not gay).

We love to worship the Lord on our faces, spending hours with Him in order to know him more. We are both hungry to hear His voice. We find our homes only in Him. We have both tasted brokenness, and it has changed our lives forever. We have both denied the approval of our parents in order to fully surrender to the Lord's call on our lives (not that that's always necessary or makes our parents any less Godly- just another commonality we share).

So there are some of the similarities between Blake and I.

Here are some things that stand out to me when I think of Blake Slatten:

When God is breaking you, he will ALWAYS push you deeper into the fire. One time, when I was bawling my eyes out over the loss of a girl in my life, he prayed aloud over me, "Lord, I pray more persecution over Blake. I pray he would become more weak than he is now, because you will be proven to be even more strong."

When you are unsure about a major change occurring in your life, Blake will ALWAYS pump you up and make you ready to recklessly abandon your inhibitions and trust that the adventure God is calling you to is much more appealing than the comfortable, boring, pacifying, dead life you are prone to choose. This urging is always from a genuine place in his own experiences, enthusiasm and faith in Jesus.

Blake sat with me for more hours than just about anyone else when I broke up with the girl I had given my heart to. For months, repeating myself and working through all God was saying to me, he faithfully and loyally sat there and prayerfully answered every question I had and God made him one of His key mouthpieces in the Desert I found myself last Fall. Even now, we revisit our Winter breakups, our calls to suffer with the Lord. We know that these events were crucial and life-changing, integral in bringing us to where we have found ourselves today.

I remember him telling me what God had done through me to touch his life. I was sitting on a couch in the prayer room in a duplex three doors down from his house- he was sitting on a dining chair in the middle of the room, really feeling heavy, empty, and in pain with brokenness. He made the brokenness make sense by telling me how much God spoke through me because of it. I cried and shook my head with awe over how precious that moment was, completely floored that I had been blessed to this degree- that I had been chosen to experience this intense level of beauty.

His prayers over me have channelled the Lord into my spirit to the point where I have literally convulsed on the ground.

So there's a taste of Blake Slatten. As is the same with Brett and Stephen, he has touched my life with the Power of God that goes beyond man-made words and inspiration. These people (as I will reiterate as I go on to write about more of the key players in my life) are the people God has spoken to me through. They are my teachers, my pastors. The Lord through these people is the reason I am experiencing this level of intimacy with Jesus. I am madly in love with these people.

Bless them, Lord.

I Wanna Be Like This Kid.

His name is Tyton. He just turned 3. He's the son of the speaker at the camp we traveled with for 5 weeks. He fearlessly jumps in the pool, knowing he can't swim, knowing that even if it looks like his father isn't looking that he'll hear the splash and scoop him up from the bottom immediately. No hesitations. No anxieties about the 'What if...'s:

Scratch that post title.

I am this kid. Right now. I jump off. No hesitations. I'm yours, Lord. I know you know what is best for me.

I don't have much to say. I've just been running sound all week for Falls Creek, enjoying some (more) alone time with the Lord, trusting that things will (again) fall into place when I get back 'home'. If you're reading this, though, stop right now and read this post by my good friend Brett.

Take Everything to the Lord...

because He knows exactly what to do with what is happening in your life. 

I'm talking evening plans (yes, He cares about those). Weekend trips. Lunch conversations. What you think about. How you take a shower. And no, I'm not kidding with the last one.

Worship Him in everything. Even brushing your teeth. Ask Him to purify your speech while you go through that morning routine. Ask Him to be the thing you feel all day as you wash your body clean of the things the world has offered you the day before. As you put in your contacts, ask Him to reveal Himself to you so He is all you set your eyes on. As you pee, thank Him for ridding you of the dead weight that deteriorates your Spiritual health. I'm still not kidding with that last one.

When I'm at my best, I'm doing these things. When I'm at my worst, I'm doing my routines. Wasting time. Forgetting and forsaking my first love with the way I brush my teeth.

Stephen

My good friend, Stephen Pyle, and I got to grab some coffee this morning and catch up on the past couple months.

Stephen is one of the people God has placed in my life as a partner in the Kingdom, a friend that loves the same music as me, and a role model in how to be disciplined.

One thing many people know about Stephen is he's a marathon runner. I can barely run a mile or two, let alone sticking it out for +30 miles as he does sometimes. He wakes up incredibly early to go out and run (I woke up at 1 pm a couple Mondays ago), mastering his body into a machine that can go for hours. I don't get it. I mean, I do but I don't. I get why, but I don't get how. Oh well.

I've known Stephen since we were in 6th grade or so at Jenks East Middle School. He claims that I scared him (I went through a rough skater/womanizer/KoRnlistening stage) back then. Over the past 8 months or so, I've seen our relationship become something completely different. Kind of like in my relationship with Brett, the Lord has changed the content of all of our conversation and has focused it on the Kingdom. We'll sit for hours at Subway, Starbucks, his house, in a car on the way to Kansas City to see Waterdeep, etc. and converse in such an intense, God-heavy way that it's physically tangible. We've discovered things about the Lord together and experienced movements of the Spirit together that can never be duplicated or out-done. He's been there for me every time I've had something hit the fan, been confused, needed to ramble for a few hours, had to cry and just feel the brokenness for a while, the list goes on.

This Fall we'll be living in Norman, OK and going to school at OU again together. Last semester was mind-blowing, seeing God take us to the homeless and addicted on California St. in OKC and meet some people we will not soon forget. We've hung cabinets in an overthrown Crack/Prostitution/Gang/Porn house and prayed with some of the dirtiest warriors of the faith that I've ever met. I've seen Stephen's selflessness and discipline to be single minded and consecrated to the Lord, and it has inspired me in ways I could never even begin to describe on this silly blog.

Lord, bless Stephen. Overwhelm him with your authority and goodness. Let him know just how near you are to him. I know he sits with you for hours every day, just to be with you. He doesn't seek his own will during those times, but Yours. Your perfect, pleasing, and good will. He knows you. May he know you more. I pray now in the name of Jesus that you would rid his life of distractions and leave only the things that you want for him. May everything that is not of you just flee his life, leaving him in perfect intimacy with You. I know that persecution must come, and seeing how faithful Stephen wants to be to you makes me sure that he will experience high levels of it, but he and I both welcome that in the fullest. I'm so excited to see what you will do in Stephen's life. I love you, Lord. Thank you for blessing my life with such an exceptional follower of you to spur me on and keep me hungry for more of you.

Tulsa

After two months of not even seeing it, and about 3 months of actually spending more than 24 hours here, I'm sitting in my old room in Tulsa, Oklahoma. It's kinda cold. My parents have put blankets over my mixing console to protect it from dust. Things are right where I left them in December when I was here for a couple weeks over the Winter break. The goofy glasses me, Blair, and Crystal wore one awesome weekend last Spring Break are still sitting on the desk beside me. hmm... weird.

This place is kind of like home, but in a more cloudy way than before. I've been out of the house for 3 years, but due to recent events, I've spent less and less time here in this spot. It all feels familiar, but it's becoming a historic place. Weird.

Joe Thomas, my roommate in Norman, sometimes reflects on life like this. I guess it's natural for me to right now because I spent the last couple evenings around him, and it doesn't take long to get in 'Joe mode' around him. Yeah, he's one of THOSE people that are loud and speak out every thought going through their heads. But you love just the crap out of them.

Sometimes he says, "It's weird to think I'm saying the same things that everyone older than me has said in my situation. It's just part of life for us- we graduate, go out of the house, take on responsibilities, and every step feels weird, and we talk about it. Think of everyone who has said this exact thing before us for generations."

Trippy, huh? I think so. Growing up is different for everyone, but it happens to everyone, and each step has these internal thoughts that go with them that we all have, and they're all the same in nature.

Well, I had NO plan of talking about that just now, but I guess it doesn't really matter.

Here's what's been on my heart prior to this moment:

I love how God is so intimately involved in our lives that we have to look at 'what the crap just happened' to see it. I don't know if I'll ever get used to the fullness of His Presence. It will always blow me away.

Story time:

I was laying on my couch in Norman, resting after an intense buffet experience with Bo Walbrick (another roommate) at Mazzio's. I had my journal out, and was talking with Bo about how God had been speaking to us. For me, I felt desperate for the Presence because I felt like I'd become lost in the sudden change of rhythm during the first few days of my break from the road. Bo was talking to me about his decision to go to Waco (which was one I've been talking with God about too) and how God had put things on his heart in some cool ways.

For some reason I felt heavy, so I journaled a prayer telling God I was waiting for Him alone. He is my rock and my refuge, my portion. I word for word journaled those things a few times (repetition helps my ADD-ness and my need for meditation), then felt God telling me to look up a text I got from Madison the night before. The text included a reference to Psalm 62 so I looked it up:

The heading was 'My soul waits for God alone.' Wow. Exactly what I wrote two seconds prior. Then, reading into the Psalm, it said, 'My rock' and 'My refuge' as well.

Lord, you're good. You know exactly what you're doing. Thank you for putting up with my tendencies to doubt your eternal Presence. I love you.

In the Studio

Phil, Matt, Eric and I have been spending the last couple of days tracking drums for four (fifth one's up for tomorrow's session) out of six songs that are lined up for a new worship record Phil is putting out. No, I couldn't go more than two days without patching cables, setting compression, placing mics, etc. WELL, maybe I could, but I don't consider this to be work at all.

First of all, I'm much more comfortable in the studio setting than with live sound (it's what I've learned the most about, plus you can screw up more and just fix it rather than living with a mistake you made during a live show- props to you live sound guys). Second, these three guys are three of my favorite people to do music with (The Neighborhood, worship sessions for Bridgeway and Norman Community, etc.). I'm overwhelmed that these guys would ask me to engineer the sounds for this project. I mean, I've written a few keys lines for the songs over the time we've been playing them, but to actually have this role in creating the most important part (drum sounds) is a big deal for me.

What a refreshing and life-giving thing to come back to in Norman! 

The first day was an adventure: Phil and I are used to creating make-shift studios together (we co-produced a girl's singer/songwriter record a year and a half ago using just a couple pre's, a compressor from the 60's, and a 002), but THIS time, we hit a jackpot. Our friend Zack has some recording gear, so we went to take inventory before setting up a tracking room. Phil didn't exactly know what some of the gear was, but after I anxiously told him of all the professional records he had heard that used these mics, pre's, and compressors, we quickly called Zack to get formal permission. Here are just the pieces that we took away to use for the drum sessions:

*Shure Sm7 (broadcasting mic- great for vocals and kick drums)

*(2) matched Cascade 'Fat Head's- ribbon mics (we're using as overheads for some warmth)

*'Red' large diaphragm condenser (by 'Blue')- we've moved this one around between the kick (always good to have a couple there for versatility in post production), side-snare, over-tom, etc.

*AKG C414 large diaphragm condenser mic- customizable patterns, HPF, dB response

*(2) Empirical Lab 'Distressor's (one of them is the EL8x- optional british mod version)- the compressors I'm most used to from working at Black Watch. They're some of the standard compressors used in every professional recording studio.

*Black Lion modded 002 interface- beefed up preamps... sadly, this one may have the power harness problem mine had last summer, so we're using Eric's. But we're not needing the onboard pre's because of all the pre's we have as outboard gear.

*Dual channel Boutique tube pre with sweepable EQs

All in all, a good $9,000 loan in gear from Zack.

We also are using:

FMR audio 'really nice preamp (RNP)'- Dual channel preamp

FMR audio 'really nice compressor (RNC)'- Stereo linked Compressor (overheads)

Vintech Dual channel tube pre (1: kick 2: snare)

(2) Shure Sm57's: top snare, floor tom, trash cymbal, etc.

So, basically it's become a much bigger deal than before, running the 4 onboard preamps of the 002 and scraping by to get the other 4 line inputs to have some preamplification worth listening to. We have great tube warmth and some great compression to choose from, with great mics to match it all up with.

Phil and I have a history of using Shure Sm57s as overheads (big no no, but we were desperate), so again, this is a playground of gear we're swimming in.

It's great, too, because Matt recently acquired a new (from 1962) Ludwig drum kit (not that he needs more, he has about 5 kick drums, 15 toms, and 12 snares to choose from because of his connections with the Flaming Lips) that sounds great on these recordings.

By using the Flaming Lips' drummer's broken C&C transparent orange shell as a kick drum extender to get more low end, and taping ripped open Little Ceasers and Pizza Shuttle boxes around mics as shields for more isolation, I'd say these are the best sounds I've been able to engineer for drums (although I'm incredibly inexperienced in comparison to the people who have taught me).

So for those of you who have skipped to this paragraph because all I did was geek out for the majority of this post, I'm just documenting an incredibly undeserved blessing from the Lord during this break from traveling around with Nick and the band. Thank you for being part of my life (Wildweek Staff especially), and I pray that the Lord would bless you for being such a huge blessing in my life.

Lord, thank you for the way you speak to me through creating music. I pray that everything we do to see this worship record come together would be worship to you. You've given us some great tools, now find us faithful in putting it to work. Blow our minds with what this record will do for people. We want this to be a furthering of your kingdom; not just some cool rockstar record. A tool for knowing you more. Not a glamorous milestone of musical success. We please you, Lord. Not Man.

I love you, Lord.

I love you, reader of this post.

I've created a Flickr Account

so you can look at my photography stuff without it looking like crap on facebook (I don't know why, but photos automatically take on a terrible quality when uploaded on facebook...)

The link is under 'my photography' on the LINKS to the right ----->

Sitting On MY Couch

Feels good.

I wonder if all my roommates are in town. I know Blake Slatten is- he's asleep in our bed.

After 12 hours of traveling from Craptown, South TX, I'm home for the week. And it feels weird- but good. I haven't been in my bed since two months ago, so this is gonna be awesome. All I have to do is crawl in it without waking up Slatten. Haha, I love the life I've been given.

Until I have something very interesting to say,

Blake.

A Notification to All My Friends and Family

I'm nuts. 

I've been tossing around the idea of not going to school in the Fall and going to a mission school in Waco, but due to the unfolding of some recent events, I halfway decided to go back to school and live with some really cool guys in Norman. Today, when I went to finalize my enrollment, I clicked 'finalize' and looked at the clock: 3:33. That number comforted me.

I love laughing at myself for things like these. I've gone insane. Well, at least a little bit. But I'm okay with that. You should see how many times these things happen- how many times I see a certain number and and the Lord speaks to me through it- it's weird. But as much as I don't like it, in a weird way, I love it. I love that no one will be able to believe me until they experience it themselves. I don't believe everyone should be seeing numbers like I do. I believe God develops an intimate, real language with everyone as individual and unique as that person is. For some crazy reason, I see some numbers a lot. Here's another one (if you haven't already, read some of the posts I've put up that have numbers as titles):

I was at a mexican restaurant in Boerne, TX this weekend, and for some reason I felt in my Spirit that the number that my change would come out to would be significant. And it was. It was 11.07. the last four digits of my old home phone number, a number me and my old youth minister shared (he has a really funny memory that includes it), and a recurring one that pops up only at opportune times.

That night I was checking my email, and I got a message from a girl who works on staff with the camp we're at. It was incredible. She was sharing with me some things I could pray for her about, and told me of some ways I've encouraged her even though we have only had like one real conversation that took place over two weeks ago. After I finished reading it, my eyes caught the time: 11:07.

I'm not trying to convince you, I just thought I'd let you guys know. So think I'm nuts (like I do) or think it's totally normal, I don't really care. At all.

Love you!

Blake.

Getting a Break

This being the middle of the 5th week of being on the road, I'm getting excited about being in Oklahoma for a week next week. I'll be on my way home two days from now! Yes! Then, after the two weeks after that, I'll be trying to settle into the Fall semester. I should probably stop typing and finalize my enrollment, but that can wait. School will always be there, and it doesn't matter if I get the exact classes I need- there are plenty of things to be worried about, and those are not them.

Basically, this post is about celebration. I'm reading a book on celebrating the extraordinary elements of the everyday. It's called 'Cold Tangerines.' Thanks, Grant. It's nothing too profound, it's just a collection of this chick's life stories, and how she reflects on them now; but I LOVE reading about them. I love seeing someone make epic moments out of the mundane, normal events that every day offers. I feel like I've almost perfected that, sometimes leading to an overreaction to things, which isn't the best thing, but I'd rather my valleys be deeper and my mountains be taller than feel nothing. We miss a lot when we just try to 'survive' the season we're in. We have a lot to learn when things are hard, so we might as well own the situations God has put us in and allow them to hurt us to the fullest, surprise us to the fullest. That act will definitely leave us with so much gained. Then, when things are great, we know that it's not just those times we get to enjoy- they are truly blessings from the Lord, times when we get to choose Him as our portion. 

So instead of looking at blessed times (i.e. my week off coming up) as the good times, the times when everything is finally okay for a while, let's live. Let's stop complaining. Worrying. Anxiously awaiting something better. Let's tap into the Kingdom- the water in the desert. the manna in the wilderness. the Provision that satisfies exactly what we need. When we are in blessed times, we don't feel like we need God at all. At least not nearly as much as when a friend dies or a parent leaves or we get sick or scared. Do we? 

Let's be careful about when and why we long to be delivered from the desert times. When you're there and God is hand-feeding you because of how weak you are and how strong He is, realize how blessed you are. how happy you are. nothing tastes better when you're exhausted, thirsty and hot than cold water. 

I know I talk about this stuff a lot. I know I've repeated myself a million times.

But here's what I will (hopefully) always believe in:

Brokenness brings us closer to the Lord, and being near to the Lord is all that matters.